It may take time and some effort how to find your happiness habits.
The American writer and philosopher Elbert Hubbard, said that “happiness is a habit” and that we need to “cultivate it.”
Even Aristotle wrote: “Happiness depends upon ourselves.”
I know that they were both onto something!
Happiness take practice, acceptance and commitment. Happiness to your decision, so decide and commit to it. So how do you find your happiness habits?
You have the control, and you can decide to be happy or not. No one else can do that for you. No other outside influence controls your happiness. It is all in the way you choose to view life. And what you choose affects your performance in all areas of your life.
I remember being told years ago, when I was moaning about how unfair I was being treated, what a nightmare (that wasn’t the word I remember using!!) my boss was and I carried on moaning saying “she made me feel.” I must have said a a couple of times before my coach stopped me bluntly and dramatically putting his hand up as if to stop me moving forward.
“STOP! No one makes you feel anything. They have said or behaved in a certain way and you have chosen how to react to it.”
“You have the choice, Linda.”
“What’s it to be?”
“You have a choice to continue acting like a victim to their behaviour, or choose how you want to react to it.”
“What’s it to be?”
Now, I am NO victim! But it struck me as really powerful and a pivotal moment in my self development, my learning how to do ME!
It’s all about the decisions we make and how we decide to do US.
Daily Happiness
That is why it is so important to make the decision to be happy, to commit to happiness daily.
The real secret and key to improving our attitude is gratitude. Counting our blessings, and not our problems and mistakes.
Yes, there are some really great practical steps: like enough sleep, fuelling your bodies with good food, drinking enough water and of course moving your body, but you don’t have to 10X all these. Gentle, sensible and practice choices works just as well too!
Most importantly, figure out your Why, Your Purpose, and pursue it with commitment and contentment.
Happiness 101
It’ll take some time and some practice, so start with what makes us happy?
Well, I know what makes me happy – time with my family, walking the on the beach, hugs (I’m a great hugger) sunshine, a lovely massage, watching crime drama and losing myself in the story. Hanging out with my lovely hubster, and talking rubbish and planning our trips! Cashmere jumpers, the smell of fresh cut grass, the sound of the waves, the smell of the salty water, sand beneath my toes.
Chatting to my daughters. The colour yellow – specifically chartreuse that lime greeny / yellow. That first (and only) cappo of the day in a takeaway cup, cupping it in my hands to keep them warm and making it last as long as I can. Benson my Goldie, the way he’s so happy to see me, even if I’ve just popped out for 5 minutes. The way his tail wags and the fact he always brings me toys… Guilty secret online shopping, then fessing up to Frannnie.
I’ve learned that being grateful for these things that make me happy, actually make me even happier, because happiness really is an inside job!